Aparigraha is one of the 5 yamas of Patanjali, which can be described as ethical rules within yoga. Aparigraha means greedlessness or non grasping and limiting possessions to what is necessary. I chose this Yama as the topic of my essay for yoga teacher training and I did so because I want to confront the "wanting" I have in my life.
This evening I made and served dinner at a local church where there is a homeless program for people who find themselves without the means to put a roof over their head. As I served the dinner, I overheard a conversation with a man who had become homeless yesterday and who has battled with alcohol addiction. When I left my home for the evening to help out with this volunteer shift, all I could think about was wanting to receive an email from someone from my past to whom I had said things that made me feel quite vulnerable. After hearing this man's story, I realized how petty that all seemed in the whole scheme of things and suddenly getting a response did not seem all that important.
We are here to give and receive. Sometimes when we give, we don't receive something right away. Sometimes we receive things without having given anything. When I look deeper, I see I can give my mom the time and space she needs to vent without needing to receive anything in return. I can give of my time to volunteer more often. I can give a smile to a stranger and I have the choice to give love anytime. I can receive a compliment with graciousness. I can receive a pat on the back from my boss. I can receive friendship and kindness. I can receive and trust my inner wisdom in order to make to the best decision.
Giving and receving are like teaching and learning- they go hand in hand and one can not exist without the other. So let us learn to receive with grace and let us teach how to give whatever we can in the moment that may serve a higher purpose.
Namaste
To be vulnerable requires trust, not just in others, but in ourselves. It is said that true intimacy can not happen without vulnerability, yet our vulnerableness is often something we guard the most.
Being vulnerable requires one to first be honest with themself and then to be able to voice what we are feeling to another. It requires courage- we may not get the reponse we want or may not get a response at all.
But speaking from our heart allows an openess to the ability to face our fears head on. And once released, we no longer need to hold on to them ever again. It is scary at first, but a sense of freedom replaces the fear once the words are spoken or written.
And we are then one step closer to the initmacy that we long for.
I just returned from a yoga retreat to kick off my 2 month yoga teacher training program. We had some discussion about what yoga means and how it shows up in our lives- and where in our lives would we like it to show up more. For many in the west who practice yoga, this may seem like a strange question as many chose yoga purely for the physical aspect. But yoga is so much more.
The physical movement that many associate with yoga does a diservice to yoga as a way of life. Yoga shows up in our lives as community, wellness, passion, spirituality, fun, love and so much more. Yoga is about being aware of not just what our bodies can do, but how our thoughts work and how we can discover the mystery within. Yoga is one small part of being in touch with all the surrounds us in the now. The challenge is to take what we learn on the mat into our lives off the mat. It's easy to come to a class and centre for 90 minutes, but can we take that calm groundedness out into traffic, to our relationships with loved ones and with our coworkers?
You don't have to be able to do backbends and headstands in order to enjoy the benefits of yoga. You just have to be willing to open to the possibilities.
Today was day one of classroom sessions and it has been quite fascinating to learn more about the history of yoga and the benefit that the poses bring. Today I learned through meditiation how quickly my mind wants to wander- and to the strangest places! My goal for tomorrow is to be more centered and able to keep my mind focused for more than the count of three. I also learned that no matter how many times I have heard an instructor gives cues for a pose, it is a whole different story to be on the teaching side.
Well, afterall, that is what I am there for.
I ride public transport to work five days a week. I have a "bus" friend who I chat with for most of my journey. I have had some amazing moments where I connected with someone for a few stops. But mostly what I find is that people have "tuned " out to this type of connection. Most have ear buds in with music blaring so loudly that my past training in hearing testing makes me cringe at what they are doing to their hearing cells.
But worse than that I fear what is happening to our ability to connect to one another. I was speaking to a coworker the other day who reminded me that in the past, people used to not need internet dating sites- they would meet on the bus, planes, trains and other public places. But if everybody is wandering around with their sense of hearing occluded, what does this mean for our ability to care for and be in tune with one another.
Instead of minimizing our senses, I would like to see us expand them, particularly those that we as a modern society have lost- our sense of wonder, our sense of awe, our intuition and the knowledge that there is so much more out there that we can see, feel, smell taste- and hear.
So while I can't stop others from tuning out, I can do my part to turn on to the world around me- the beautiful sunrise I see as I ride the train over the bridge, the snow covered mountains I see on my way home and the curious eyes of the baby in the stroller beside me on the bus... and to be grateful for the conversations I have with my bus friends that make my commute a little less monotonous and my journey that much more fulfilling.
